When I can't...

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23

Today when I checked the mail there was an envelope with Aaron's handwriting on it!  You couldn't imagine my excitement.  I went home and sat down.  When I started to open it I realized it felt pretty thick.  I thought, "Either he put a bunch of letters together in one envelope, or this isn't a letter."  The latter was true; it was just some information about his graduation events--no note, no message, no letter.  You can imagine my disappointment.  The first thing that came into my mnd was, 'he's not writing.'  Why else would I get a piece of mail that he had addressed to me by his own hand, but not get any letters?  If he can mail this, can't he mail letters?  But after some rational thinking, I decided that that just can't be true.  He would write.  I am now sure that they are really just not letting him. 

God reminded me of Paul when he was on his missionary journeys and his only form of communication with the church was through letters.  Back then when they were carried by foot, I'm sure it took weeks.  We are so blessed to have our modern-day forms of communication and we really take them for granted.  I couldn't imagine being in jail and having to wait weeks until I got a response from a letter I'd sent.  And even when Paul was dealing with all of that he allowed God to produce in him the fruit of the spirit.  When I read, "But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience...."  I think, Lord I don't know how I'm supposed to have joy... peace... patience..."   I don't understand it, but I'm so glad that God knows that I can't produce those qualities on my own.  When I feel so down and disappointed, the last thing that my sinful self wants to feel is joyful, at peace, and patient.  When I can't, God can.  So I'm also thankful that He is using this time to make me depend on Him.  It's hard, very hard... but I know that it's good.